Art, Pussy and the Power of Pleasure

Yes, we're going there.

In the spirit of Christmas, I was in an art show called “The Naughty List” and I'm sharing the 2 paintings I had in the show at the bottom of this page, but before I show them, I want to talk about pleasure. We’re so quick to write off and exclude what makes us feel good in life because it may not be “logical” or we’re told it’s wrong/bad/selfish – but I want to argue that pleasure is just as important (if not more) than doing what’s logical. 

So let’s talk about: art, pussy and the power of pleasure. 

*****(A note to the men that have found their way here: don’t you dare get weird, inappropriate or flirty. I won’t allow it in my space — we can have a conversation about pleasure, our bodies and sexuality, as adults. I’ll remove you from my world so fast if I feel even the slightest bit uncomfortable by your presence. Be respectful.) 

Our pleasure is fucking important in this life, especially as women and femmes, and not just sexually, but yes definitely that too. I’m talking about pleasure in the sense of joy, fun, plain ole feeling good. 

Our society and conditioning has taught us to value logic and rationality to the point that many of us are completely cut off from what we truly desire and what makes us feel good. And I’m calling fucking bullshit. We become so miserable when we don’t allow ourselves to desire what we really want. We suppress, and in turn suffer. I don’t know about you, but I refuse to live like that anymore. I spent most of my life that way and quite literally wanted to die. 

But we get to choose. Of course there are circumstances outside of our control, but we get to decide how WE show up for life. We have a say in how we respond to anything and everything (although it does take practice to respond intentionally).  

Since getting sober 16 months ago, I've had to explore what brings me joy so I can stay sober. If there’s no joy in my life it drives me to desperately want to drink and do cocaine. While it may feel good and pleasurable to use in the moment, I know deep down I don’t ultimately desire to have substance-induced fun. (Sober) Fun is a baseline requirement of my existence. And I feel I’ve successfully integrated that in the last year. Not to brag, but my life is insanely amazing. I want everyone to experience the levels of fun, freedom and fulfillment that I've opened myself to, too.

So how have I been doing it? 

I allow myself to have desires, I don’t let guilt or shame dictate what I want or do anymore. I don’t believe I’ll be damned to hell for eternity for exploring my existence/desires as a human (thank you catholic trauma). I believe we’re all meant to have happy, fulfilling lives and that comes from allowing pleasure into our experiences everyday in some way, big or small. I allow myself to spontaneously follow my curiosity, creative impulses and ideas. (You’ll learn a lot about yourself and wise discernment if you start down this path of intentional pleasure.) 

Following our desires and our pleasure lights us up, it’s enlivening and energizing. It gives meaning where life used to feel mundane. It sparks creativity and it gives life to what was once lifeless. 

Pleasure brings us deeper into the experience of being human. 

With our world being as fucked up and depressing as it can be, I feel this is an extremely important topic to explore, so we can come alive again and make real change and positive impact while we’re on earth. I've always been a big dreamer and I truly believe we have the power to change things for the better. We may feel powerless at times, but I want to encourage you and invite you to explore the power you have within your life to choose pleasure and see how that ripples to the people around you.

Do us all a favor and don’t write off your pleasure as unimportant or unworthy anymore. When we live from a place of pleasure, we have so much more capacity to give to those around us because we're turned on by life, and again, not just sexually, but like we're lit up from within with energy that's radiant and truly alive. When we prioritize living from a place of pleasure, our cup becomes full and the joy we experience overflows to those around us. Pleasure is not selfish!!!! You deserve joy and goodness.

If you’re more curious about this topic, I have a crazy good book recommendation for you — it’s called “Pussy: a Reclamation” by Regena Thomashauer. It explores all of this in much more depth and it’s a fascinating read. I highly recommend buying from small/local book stores rather than the big corporate chains. 

I finished the book this month and it was the inspiration for my paintings in the Naughty List show. 

Also, did you hear i signed a lease for an art studio?! Well, that book is a huge reason I felt confident enough to do so. The logic in my mind was telling me it’d be hard/scary to pay for it and honestly, I've only sold a handful of paintings in the last year, so I felt a bit (a lot) of imposter syndrome around getting the studio since I’m not a hugely established artist, BUT I felt the DESIRE to be in a studio. I felt the desire to go after something I’ve been dreaming of for years. I felt a desire to stretch my beliefs around what’s possible for me. Our desires open us to our purpose. I know in my bones I’m meant to make an impact through art, so signing this lease –even though it didn’t feel logical or rational– felt right. It felt pleasurable. 

So, in honor of pussy and pleasure, here’s the paintings from "The Naughty List" show: 

And a close up of the still-life because I'm obsessed with it:

Love ya, mean it,

P

<3